Drops of Awareness

small bits of knowledge for easy conscious infusion into your life

Archive for the month “August, 2012”

3 Secrets to Wealth Generation for Women … and (very smart) Men

Since man began keeping written records some 6000 years ago, records were kept by men, used by men, written for men, and kept secret from women. Men did business and practiced universal truths, laws, principles, and virtues until eventually those practices became habitual. While men operated businesses outside the home, women, operated inside the home.

The 1970s — when women began to take work outside of the home and women’s lib was on the scene — it seemed that this action was likely at least part of the source of the massive breakdown of western marriage. Divorce rates 40 years later for first marriages are at 50% and much higher for 2nd and 3rd marriages. Why is this important?

With marriages and families splitting apart, mature adult male role models were also disappearing! Now male adolescents had no mature male role models to emulate!  Just 75 years ago, families ran businesses together, communities spent time on projects – so there were plenty of adult men around. Today most young men don’t even have a father as a role model, let alone uncles, community members, church members, etc. What that means is that when men hit mid life and their own fear of dying, they revert back to adolescent behavior, and mature women woke up one day married for a long time … to a teen-aged boy! 

Even with the lack of male business role models, the habitual use of business tools articulated for centuries is now inherent and automatic for men, with or without role models, somewhat like the 100th Monkey Effect.  They have had the advantage in the business world without even knowing it.

Women are now deeply steeped in the business world – they are not just now entering it. Yet they come to this world without the business skills and tools that are already automatic for men. Women do have emotional intelligence skills from their centuries managing home and family, but those are not the business skills required to ‘get ahead’ in the business world and generate unimagined wealth.

Women don’t just want to earn the $.23 for each dollar that men do. They want more! The challenge is that because nearly all great works  were written by men and for men, those works may not resonate with women. More and more men are going home to manage family as more women are out in the business world so it is imperative women learn these skills, or remain behind men in pay earned, even for performing the same work.

The translation of these male oriented documented works — my legacy and my life’s work —  into a woman’s point of view goes a long way in having women gain these skills with alacrity, and collapse and EXCEED the pay gap in very short order.  Men who learn these business skills – or distinguish them intentionally – have a bigger advantage than women with those skills.

Keep watching as I will reveal those 3 simple business secrets so that women can enjoy unbridled and unimagined wealth … and so that the smart men that choose to learn and revisit them on purpose, will watch their revenue catapult exponentially. Wealth is ours for the taking. Few enjoy it due to this missing information. In the end it’s learning that is the miracle grow for human beings.

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About Leslie Flowers, personal growth expert.

I help people tap into their infinite potential and prove to themselves that they are capable of more than they imagined. I do this in facilitated group coaching sessions, where people learn to use the power of the mastermind to harness their latent personal power. Women who have been through my workshops find that they are able to make as much money as men—or more. This is just one example of how I help people create performance breakthroughs.

I was trained by Bob Proctor (thought leadership), Steve Siebold (speaker certification), Christian Simpson (coaching), Michael Nicholas (coaching), and Roddy Galbraith (speaking). I also completed Landmark Education’s full curriculum for living and leadership. I have incorporated the best of what I’ve learned from the world’s best teachers and built my own distinct coaching methodology. I am truly doing what I love, and nothing gives me more fulfillment than helping others create lives that they love!

7 Qualities of Coaching Excellence

This article featured in Inner Change Magazine for September 2012. It is my intention that if you are looking for a coach … and even in the thinking about it stage … you will find great value here my friends.

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When we get a university or associate degree or a coaching certificate, it means we have done the book work. The degree or certification does not mean we will become an expert or even be very good in the practical application of this material.

It is important to find someone who is not only an expert but who is also a good fit. Someone could be highly skilled but might not resonate with you and, conversely, a poor coach might seem like a good fit but is not very skilled.

1. The expert coach strives to follow an industry-wide code of ethics.

More and more coaches are becoming part of the newly formed “Experts Industry,” a professional association that is establishing a code of ethics as well as business parameters for personal, business, and life coaches. Until late 2011, the coaching industry operated, to the best of my knowledge, with no official code of ethics. Without agreed upon boundaries and parameters in doing business, regardless of the field, some coaches will be honest and some will not. I look forward to this ‘industry association’ keeping coaching a ‘clean’ business.

2. The expert coach is a good listener.

An expert coach has done a tremendous amount of inner work with his or her own coach. Shutting down personal inner chatter is required to really listen to the client. This coach will repeat back to the client precisely what he or she heard, making absolutely sure the client is understood.

3. The expert coach is deeply curious.

The coach-client relationship is unique and more transparent than any other relationship between humans. As a result of item 2 above, to be the client’s biggest cheerleader, a coach must step out of his or her own world … and step into the world of the client. Now the expert coach can clearly see the client’s greatness and infinite potential. The coach already knows we each have these qualities buried within our beliefs as to our abilities.

4. The expert coach can ‘set aside’ his or her own point of view.

It really takes expertise to step into the client’s world and see her, and only her. A coach who judges the client and has poor pure listening skills cannot be your biggest proponent.

5. The expert coach is accountable.

Expert coaches often have their own coach, being proactively responsible and accountable for their own personal growth. They also have ‘blind spots’ that prevent them from putting aside their own points of view so they can be the ‘observers.’ Being coached and growing as a coach is just as important as being a coach for someone else. Expert coaches must learn and grow even faster than their clients.

6. The expert coach looks for what is missing in the client’s thinking.

The expert coach, with pure listening, sees through the blind spots and the things the client does not see. Once determined, the expert coach will begin a dialogue that will have the client ‘seeing’ her blind spots for herself.

7. The expert coach asks questions 98% of the time.

The expert coach knows through his or her own training that clients already have all the answers within them. And because the coach can ‘see’ what’s missing in their client’s thinking or thought process that would make a difference for them on-the-spot, it’s a challenge to just not ‘tell’ them what appears obvious. Asking questions is a skill. It’s easy to ‘tell’ someone what they can do. Do you, the client, want to learn to fish, so you can eat for a lifetime? Or would you prefer finding someone every day to do your fishing for you?

The Unexpected Lesson

“I have learned, that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” Henry David Thoreau

“Just smile,” I was thinking, as I pictured my friend Chris Wellington (right) who starts his weekly Facebook jokes with that phrase.

The Story

I’ve been asking the universe for some time now to send me a man to share good times with. It’s been more than 10 years since the dissolution of my 30 year marriage. Finally, my eye is no longer attracted to a man resembling my former husband. That’s a sign!!

And my coach said recently that my heart will open up when I’m ready.

One day, there was a comment on my FaceBook wall from a man. The content told me clearly this person was a baby in social media … maybe even an embryo! Nonetheless, I thanked him for his kind comments and let it go.

Let me say that 6 months ago, I might have rolled my eyes and deleted the post, annoyed. I would have reacted. What was different this time was that I responded.

My first thought when I read the comment was “how sweet.”

I shared this with my coach and she said “you’re ready!” It was the responding in lieu of reacting, I figured.

And, she said something about the Universe sending him and my heart opening. So I sat with that. So often the things I’ve wanted have shown up in unexpected ways. Was this another one?

When I returned to my wall, there was another comment, imploring me to call him. I did nothing. This is very unusual behavior for me for I’m rarely without something to say or write.

A day later I removed the posts from my wall and sent him a private note saying I would call.

Today I went to look for his number. I was in the right mindset to call him. I couldn’t find the number. Then I remembered we had one mutual friend! I checked her wall, and here it is my friends ….

With little exception, the same imploring notes he wrote on my wall, he entered on her wall as well!

I just had to … SMILE.

 The Lesson?  It doesn’t matter how your heart begins to open … it just matters that it does!

 

 

Napoleon Hill – The Man

What kind of man was Napoleon Hill? Was he kind? Did he treat people well? Did he respect women? Did he apply his works? Was he a cusser? A womanizer? A cheat?

How would we know these things about him to begin with? We can read about him and what he reported.  Wait, you don’t know WHO he is? Not to worry!

Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich and the 1st ever consolidated Philosophy of Personal Achievement, was a cub reporter for a newspaper when he met Andrew Carnegie, the great steel magnate!

Carnegie offered this 20-something the opportunity to meet, know, and interview more than 500 of our country’s greatest achievers in diverse areas of life and business. And there would be no pay! Hill met with them more than once and charted their businesses over a 20 year period. Who in their right mind would take on a 20 year gig without pay? Perhaps that’s an indication of who Napoleon Hill – the Man – was.

Why did Carnegie hire Hill to do these interviews anyway?  To see what those people were doing that the rest of us WERE NOT! Now there is a Blueprint for advanced achievement and wealth … and guess what? While Think and Grow Rich is the 6th best selling book of all time, PEOPLE DO NOT STUDY IT. Oh, they may read it, OR, be one of the masses who ‘buy books and NEVER READ THEM them.’ Yes, it’s true. Buying … and even reading a book does not commit it to memory or to habitual behavior … the whole point of the book!

I listen to Hill’s old recordings of the philosophy of personal achievement as often as possible. In these recordings, Hill reveals some of ‘what makes a man.’

As a young boy, Hill’s mother died and his father quickly remarried and introduced his new wife, Napoleon’s step mother, to Hill, who had decided he was not GOING TO LIKE her.  Who could replace one’s own mother anyway?

As determined as Hill was to dislike is step mother, she was the first person to see the potential within him, encourage him, and be his biggest proponent. She was a huge influence on him for this and another important incident.

One day his stepmother’s dental plate fell to the floor and broke in two. Hill’s father was able to solve a way to bond it until another could be made. The plate worked so well, the father began to offer dentistry services. All went well, finances increased and the Hill’s were on their way toward living a more than meager life.

Another day a notice arrived by mail alerting the Hill’s that to practice dentistry, one had to be ‘certified.’ At that point Mr. Hill the father was ready to give up. The step mother however, launched him into action and encouraged and inspired to take the training! And he did, achieved his dentistry certificate, and moved his family into more and more comfortable surroundings.

Napoleon Hill learned acceptance and persistence from his step mother. Then when he stood around a cast iron kettle with others, sipping the cooked product, later to be sold for $500, including the kettle, by the doctor who created the libation to a local druggist – Hill met his wife to be. They were sipping coca cola.

Highly influenced by a powerful woman 100 years ago, and then offered the opportunity to connect with 500 US greats and their habits and practices of wealth creation over time, Napoleon Hill became a man’s man. While I am clear he was not a perfect man, he did walk the walk and talk the talk for to consolidate this volume of excellent teachings would require immersion and infusion of the principles and philosophy into his own being.

One of my favorite quotes by Hill, paraphrased, from Think and Grow Rich is this ….

Successful people make quick decisions and are very slow to change them, if at all.

On September 11, I will facilitate an ABSOLUTE Mastermind™ based on Think and Grow Rich over an 8 weeks, in person, my 30th of this kind. More information HERE  on this study.

Gold ‘Win’ by a Fraction

She won the Gold at the Olympics by a FRACTION of an inch!

Four top world class gymnasts, as example, all perform brilliantly by all accounts, and standings fall within a fraction of one point.

What is that has Gabby Douglas edge out other world class gymnasts by a tiny fraction?

Is it setting good Goals? NO WAY!

Setting a huge goal is NOT WHAT HAS YOU WIN BY LESS THAN A SECOND. It is important certainly that to get to the Olympics you did set a big goal!

It’s something altogether different and a RARITY, yet within our reach, absolutely, that had Gabby edge out others and pick up the Gold.

Consider first that only a tiny fraction of those gymnasts training for the Olympic games ever get there.

And consider that the tiny fraction training are an even tinier representation of athletes; and even tinier still of human beings on the planet that are in the age rage and physically fit.

So we are talking about the smallest segment of human beings … LESS THAN 3% because…

THESE FOLKS are in the .01% … they do something NO ONE ELSE DOES!

Know it yet?  The Japanese use this tool and it has had them take charge in more areas than athletics.

It’s called Kaizen.

After training 6 hours daily for months, day in and day out, as example, what do you think she does at the end of the 6 hours that is DIFFERENT than those she beat for the Gold?

If you said “she did one extra equipment round each day,” YOU ARE CORRECT!

It is the EXTRA MILE … doing one EXTRA thing each day that others do not do, that has you win Gold.

So as you flop onto the couch patting yourself on the back for walking 1 mile each day … you are accomplished absolutely! You are disciplined and doing what you said you would do, likely even when you didn’t feel like it today. Bravo!

If, however, YOUR BIG GOAL is to get to the Olympics to complete, you’d better walk an extra 500 feet every day! Then YOU will take home the Gold!

That’s it! That’s all! Kaizen.

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