Drops of Awareness

small bits of knowledge for easy conscious infusion into your life

Archive for the category “Self Image”

Think of Yourself as an Expert?

expert-1Even with a university degree in your hand, please don’t consider yourself an Expert! You are NOT!

NO ONE IS with only a degree in hand! Even with an M.S., Ph.D. and M.D., expertise comes much, much later.

It takes dedication and practice of your craft over time to attain Expert status. And you don’t need a university degree to BE an Expert either!

You could look at young Napoleon Hill, a cub reporter, when he met Andrew Carnegie and was engaged by Carnegie to do what is considered by most as THE most important piece of work in the 20th century, hands down. Find out what successful people do … that the unsuccessful fail to do.

Hill became a Success Expert by interviewing more than 10,000 people over 20 years, including consistent, repeated progress reporting during that time with 500 of our country’s happy, healthy and wealthy individuals, and documenting the findings in Think and Grow Rich almost 100 years ago. To this day you will see threads of Hill’s work in all the greats in personal development. If they say not … I purport they are fibbing.

1.       Gathering and studying in-depth over time, with results to match.

Hill was not a journalism expert. He became a Success Expert because he made it his business to immerse himself as no one had ever done before over time with ‘living successes.’  Degree? Meaningless, really. Hill learned quickly that what we believe we will achieve. Six beliefs that could limit your success articulated in this blog.

You?  You can be a reporter in a field you adore and are inspired by and then BE an expert in that field!

2.       Maintain consistent positive results over time.

Experts not only have done in depth study in their field, they have been practicing it, teaching it and have documented measurable results of their work over time.

Jumping from one field to another – chasing the dollar – does not make you an Expert – well maybe in chasing the dollar, you are.

3.       Best-selling author?

Unfortunately there is now a system that a smart person can figure out (or pay to learn) that will FORCE their book to have ‘best seller status!’  Yes, that is correct. Anyone with money can BE a best selling author!

That does not mean the author is an Expert in anything! It means they are smart enough to USE the system so they ‘look’ like a best-selling author. Their book does not have to meet any standards of excellence and rarely does.

It does not mean categorically either that the author is NOT a good writer. It simply means if you are a smart cookie and/or have enough gumption or money to hire someone, you can manipulate the system for this status. And it can never be taken away from you.

If you have established yourself as an Expert in one field and jump around to similar ancillary fields, chasing the almighty dollar – this doesn’t make you an Expert in the new field.

4.       Pushing Products.

If you are also smart enough to ‘buy’ online product marketing expertise, or figure it out for yourself, it doesn’t mean that your materials are Expert. In fact if you USE this system of manipulative influence, you really are doing those purchasing your product(s) a disservice. Just because you know the ‘systems’ and have bought ‘lists’ and affiliation relationships, these things do NOT make you an Expert in your field.  Pedaling products that are untried with no consistent measurable results, IS the disservice.

5.       Certifications rather than Degrees.

There are many money-making, certificate giving, coaching institutions that teach you to be a coach. Just because you paid and did the written work, does not mean you are an Expert coach. You may not even be a decent coach! It means you took the courses. You would need to gain consistent results over time, that are measurable and sustainable, to reach Expert status. And the best coaches in the world have no certification from these organizations! If you are a coach or want to be one, you may enjoy this post about coaching excellence.

  • It’s easy to assume best seller means Expert.
  • It’s easy to assume that coaching certification means Expert.
  • It’s easy to assume if you are an Expert in one field, that you can jump to an ancillary one and still maintain that status.

For consumers … be weary of where and how you spend money with Experts.

ASK them for the results of their current programs and products, before you spend one dime. Remember that smart ‘rats’ who are after money first and serving people second, will sell you down the river to feed their own bank accounts. A bit of due diligence on your part will yield your investing smartly in your own growth with true Experts … not with smart folks who know how to manipulate the systems in place to make money.

Side Note:

In 2011 the Experts Industry Association was formed for coaches, speakers, authors, trainers, and online product marketers by Brendon Burchard. Members promise to work transparently and with integrity, no matter what. I am proud to be a member of this organization.

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We Already Have Perfect Memory

memory2So often I hear people say .. and often write “I am losing my memory!”

Or, “I can’t find my keys! See … I told you I’m losing my memory!”

Or, “what did I come into this room to get? I must be losing my memory.”

Your ability to remember WILL be diminished … if you BELIEVE IT! And the more you THINK it, SAY it, and WRITE it, the more you will believe it.

What we BELIEVE … we GET. Simple as that!

Whether we believe we are losing our memory … or that we have PERFECT MEMORY … both are correct and available to us. Either can be embedded as belief by our REPEATING our thoughts consistently in intervals over time.

What to do to improve memory? Well it is already perfect! You just don’t BELIEVE it yet!

  • Every time you ‘catch’ yourself saying any of the items above (or derivatives), SAY or WRITE the opposite! In the beginning it will ‘feel’ inauthentic and it IS a lie at that time. The phenomenon is tied up in the Law of Polarity … every up has a down; dark and light; inside and outside. And so it is with our beliefs. We can choose to believe we are forgetful … OR … we can choose to believe we have a perfect memory!

There are those who go way beyond perfection in memory! You might enjoy this book by Jerry Lucas and Harry Lorayne “The Memory Book” which is not read from beginning to end like most books, but allows the reader to select what they wish to remember … better!

And Jim Kwik of Kwik Learning works with improving memory along with speed reading and brain performance. He is the consummate industry expert! I watched him teach 400 people to count to ten in Japanese in 3 minutes! While I have a perfect memory (and I occasionally forget 😉 I am registered and learning with Jim Kwik and his programs.

Unfortunately, societal programming starting at a very early age, along with passed on beliefs of our parents and family, has almost everyone walking around

  1. having no idea we have a choice, and 
  2. having no idea HOW to make the change in what we believe.

Once you know you can make a choice in what you believe about your memory (and everything else), just practice the bullet point above! Do it with consistency and get excited about how it will be for you when you are remembering things like a pro!

Before long you will be saying my memory is perfect … and so it will be … and so it IS!

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illust by hyoin min 민효인(a.k.a nyoin) www.nyo-in.com/

Why We Don’t Listen to One Another

listeningIn 1996 I learned an amazing lesson for myself when I took my first Landmark Forum. The program is an eye-opener for those curious in why life is going the way it is for us. We learned more than a dozen powerful insights or distinctions that weekend. When I returned home, I remember having an interesting conversation with my husband.

  1. I made a statement.
  2. He perceived it based on what he thought I meant.
  3. Then he reacted to his point of view.
  4. I told him that was not what I meant.
  5. He said but you said such and such.
  6. And around in circles we went!

It took me 3 tries explaining this distinction until he got that his perception of my intention was not the same as my intention! 

I realized he was actually having a dialogue with himself! I might as well have left the room because it was between what he believed I meant and his response to that!

Sixteen years later, having a conversation with a married gentleman at a social function (he was attending one of my mastermind groups) he shared about a breakthrough he had with his wife. As he told the story of realizing he really had never listened to her (the thing she kept telling him she wanted), the lesson from long ago ‘popped’ into my mind, as clear as it was all those years ago. I shared my conversation with my husband all those years ago … and he said exactly! I can share that his wife was thrilled that he got this because he was LISTENING TO HER, finally!

This is about distinguishing our perception of what someone else means … and checking in with them to see if the perceptions and your intentions match.

How often do we react to what someone says based on what we ‘think’ they meant?
How often has someone reacted to what you said — and they were way off base?

Without distinguishing this for ourselves, we never really listen – really listen to what people are saying. We are simply interpreting what we hear, based on our own view of the world; no two views are identical by the way, and then having a dialogue with ourselves!

Perception changes with new information so our ‘view’ of things changes when and if we actually take the time to find out what the other person really meant and wanted to share.

To make a change right now in your own listening, it would mean simply stopping a moment and asking the other person “did you mean this when you said thus-and-such?” (Successful sales people use this technique all the time with their clients. They know if their potential client is not ‘heard’ they will not buy.)

Without intentionally taking this next step, the other person is left unheard — and our greatest desire as humans is to BE heard and to MATTER. One person is right and the other is left feeling wrong. There is no room for a real dialogue. There is no collaboration. There is no growth.

Consider —  WANTING to know what they meant so you can find out WHY they said it and then expanding your own perception … while theirs is also expanding!

Shift-Ware

las-mananitasWhat if there was a technology that measured your growth and shifts in conscious awareness? How wonderful would that be? Well, in fact, there is such a thing! Let me tell you about shift-ware!

I am talking about self monitoring and measuring when practice of a new habit or way of being that you have intentionally improved, actually ‘takes over’ – that is, it now has the weight and intensity required to be the ‘habit of choice.’ The old ones (habits/beliefs) have had their teeth into us for so when a new habit actually ‘over writes’ an old habit (none of them ever disappear of course as you cannot erase matter and thoughts are things) is quite an undertaking and worth noting.

I have taken to looking at my own behavior as either from the ‘head’ (ego/belief driven) or the ‘heart’ (faith/intuition driven).  Both are available to us at all times, however, only ONE is prevalent in any given moment. And the most powerful one is typically the behavior or belief that limits our reaching our potential.

What better example of self monitoring shift-ware than in myself to explain?

Last week I was attending a wedding of a dear friend in Mexico.  Amid all the hub-bub (and believe me a Catholic wedding in Mexico is serious and has lots of lovely details) I found a two hour slot to nap. I needed it. On that Friday afternoon I crawled into my bed and closed my eyes. Situated at the end of the property, there was construction going on in the next building.

My old way of being would be to think “I’m going to call the desk and get them to stop hammering! How dare they disturb my nap time!” That’s the head, the ego, still showing up as the world revolves around me. Know the feeling?

What happened was astounding and instantaneous. What I heard myself thinking was “how wonderful that these people are working! They are blessed to be able to feed their families.”

With eyes closed, every time I heard the banging I smiled and the noise became the music that settled in my heart … and off to nap land I went!

When I woke up I wrote this down (while I have a perfect memory, sometimes I do forget) I saw that now my ‘heart’ was in charge, not my ‘head!’

I win! I thought! After 5 solid years of using the work I teach around living a principled life, what it takes to do that, how universal law plays a part, and understanding precisely how the mind works when it comes to personal results, here was an example … a great one!

There have been many others over these years … this was not the first, but it came with a cluster of other new habits that took ‘hold’ on that trip. It seems that all the work and practice is ‘popping’ left and right for me and I know it can for you.

You can operate your own ‘shift-ware’ by starting right now, regardless of your current circumstances. It costs nothing to do this. It takes time, yet it is not hard at all. Takes a bit of desire and persistence is all.

In January I will be conducting training online/conference that will provide an overview and deep understanding of how to begin the shift-ware process personally, and I’ll be the first to use an online support tool that has never been used in the corporate world before. It is in use by 10k students in universities only thus far. Besides the training calls, there is a highly interactive online classroom with deep analytics to capture your own shift-ware potential. Watch for details. It will be the first so will be at a very low price as I want to see the results, of course!

In the meantime, dear readers, I wish you a warm and wonderful holiday season, and I lift my glass to your prosperity burgeoning in 2013!

Mastermind

You well know the experience during an inspired interchange with someone like minded, how ideas begin to flow and ‘pop’ into your mind. When this occurs you are not creating a third mind, but exponential minds. You get all sorts of ideas that you may never note again when engaged with another.

When asked why it is we can see what others cannot see about hidden behaviors, yet cannot do this for ourselves, I got to thinking. Perhaps the reason we cannot do this for ourselves is that we are ‘meant to’ engage with other human beings.

There are only two ways of which I am aware that we ‘receive’ information we require to reach what it is we want. The information can be positive or negative. Seems positive makes sense, yet we receive a lot of information by default – that is, we receive it and are simply unaware. That’s how the negative thinking seeps in and eventually becomes a belief. And of course in every case, whether we are aware or not,  what we believe we get. Results match our belief in our own abilities. We can talk about how capable we are, yet the hidden part of our personality may not be in alignment with what we ‘say.’

The first way is via intuition. Wayne Dyer says that if prayer is when we speak to God; his answers come via intuition. That sense of right or wrong. Going to bed with a problem and waking up with the answer – that’s God or spirit or the Universe accessing our conscious mind and placing the answer for our awakening.  Intuition can however be blocked by fear. That is why the early morning ‘answers’ are the best as there is no time to second guess the message.

The other way we receive the information we need is through other people. So if we’re the kind of person who does everything ourselves and rebuffs contribution by others, we are cutting off the voice of God! That leaves only one way … intuition.

You’ve likely experienced what is often called a coincidence by those who do not yet understand that there is no such thing – when an answer to a question we have shows up ‘unexpectedly.’ As we believe and move toward what it is we want, what we want is “already moving toward us!”

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours.” Henry David Thoreau.

This is what Thoreau was pointing to … that success, true wealth, health and happiness does not routinely come from a job we hold so we can STOP looking to our career and employers to make us wealthy, regardless of how good we are at what we do. It will come as we are called to our purpose – to serve others, rarely from a job-job.

Keep your eyes and ears open. Accept contribution from others. Be in places where others congregate. Watch for the unexpected surprise offer or contribution. Say YES when someone offers to help, even though you may want to do it yourself.

Masterminding with others who are like minded – thinkers! – allows YOU to do the things you are passionate about … while they do the things they are passionate about, but you are not. So gather people who you love and respect; who believe in lifelong continuous learning; and share your ideas with them. They will come up with answers you never even considered! Meeting weekly with one or more folks like this at a prescribed time and day, will enrich and enhance your journey to higher awareness.

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